My SO is in the prelimnary stages of getting involved in the EP.  She and I have been together for a little over a year and it hurts me beyond belief to come to the realization that she has been hurting and struggling for so many years.  She deserves better, just as all of you do.  I’m not pretending to understand that daily battles that you all may fight, but I can assure you that the life you deserve is waiting for you and it long overdue. 

I am so proud of my SO entering this program and facing this absolute demon.  She and every one of you deserves praise for having the strength to do so.  You are all here for different reasons are are in different stages of recovery, but you are all beautiful people and I wish I could embrace each one of you.  It is a long, difficult battle but each and every one of you deserve the end result….your happiness! 

It’s much easier to just keep living life as you were but each of you has chosen to stand up and fight!  And for that each of you deserves, praise, and a HUGE hats off!  We all know the “easy road” leads to a much scarier place.  Keep fighting and I pray for each of you to have continued strength, courage and love for yourself. =)

It’s nice to hear a spouse/sig. other say those things. Many times, that is what we, as those dealing with this crap need to hear. I wish my husband would be that open and say those things…as I am sure many others would too. Stay involved…she’ll need you!

The problem is that emotions are sometimes a foreign “language” to men.  Your man loves you and supports you entirely….we just don’t always show it the right way.  He’s got your back!  Be patient because we can emotionally clueless and dense at times.  “Old school” guys feel comfortable showing only two emotions….happiness and anger.  If we feel something other than that we can sometimes force a response that more closely meets what we are comfortable displaying. 

Reminds me of all the crap my dad used to say to me when I was little.  As I got older I learned to translate.  “You’re foolish” actually meant, ” I’m worried you are making a mistake and I want to prevent you from doing so to prevent you undue harm”. 

Hear what your man “feels” instead of what he says and above all LOVE YOURSELF!

Best wishes….

Your SO is so lucky to have you during her process at EP!  Keep remembering to be patient and loving and proud of her!  It is a journey for you as well… :)

I think you are amazing!  It’s so amazing that you’re here to support your SO.  That’s incredibly important to have someone with strength and love behind you during this challenging journey.  It’s hard.  There so many steps back, but so many more steps forward.
She’s lucky to have you. 
I wish I had someone to help shoulder this with me.

marvelous.me - 22 September 2010 01:22 AM

I think you are amazing!  It’s so amazing that you’re here to support your SO.  That’s incredibly important to have someone with strength and love behind you during this challenging journey.  It’s hard.  There so many steps back, but so many more steps forward.
She’s lucky to have you. 
I wish I had someone to help shoulder this with me.

You do!  That is why you are here!  Support comes in many forms and I KNOW you have countless people here that understand what you are going through and want you to succeed!  I don’t know you from Eve, but I’m still pulling for ya!!  Do you have anyone else close to you that may know something is wrong, but you have not opened up to them?  I know it’s tremendously scary, but I firmly believe ripping the covers off the illness is what helps loosen it’s control over you.  I have had my struggles in the past (some with food) and the most liberating thing was to open up and have those that truly love still standing at my side when I shared what I thought would make them think I was bananas.  I honestly think the illnesses and struggles we hide convince us that we need to keep them in the dark and deal with them independently.  If we do as we are “convinced” then the disease has protected itself and it can endure.  It’s existence obviously is one that erodes our own happiness. 

I guess I kinda went on a rant there.  I guess the cliff notes version is: We all support you, and there may be many people close to you that want to support you too but may be afraid to confront you (it’s SCARY to do…I know).  Give them a chance to support you =).  You’ll have many opportunities to return the favor.

Best Wishes!

i have been in and out of programs and nothing has honestly helped for a long period of time. can anyone tell me how this one is different?

I don’t really have any resources to speak of.  I just tend to be a touchy feely kinda guy.  I also rely on my own personal faith.  I pray and ask for patience and for the words to communicate therapeutically.  I also ask for strength to withstand “defense mechanisms” and fight for whats best for my fiance.  It’s tough because when I put my boot on the throat of hear eating disorder she feels some pressure too.  I love her and accept her….but this disease is NOT her.  I learn to separate the two and I have committed myself to fighting ANYTHING that hurts her.

Have you introduced him to this forum??

Looking interesting discussion..